so one day i got some retweeted posts on my timeline from an account followed by YB (ahem). in short i ended up scrolling this account and marked some of its posts as favorite :") *it didn't make me want to follow the account though. once a while is enough. bunch of those in a day will suffocate me.*
here's the top two of my favorites :
Worry about your character, not your reputation. Your character is who you are. Your reputation is who people think you are. (source)
Being nice to someone you hate doesn't mean you're fake. It means you're mature enough to tolerate your hate towards them. (source)
so thus i thought it's all normal for worrying to progress in life, to improve your character to appreciate yourself more. character is one thing that needs some room to breathe, some space to grow, some chance for (better) changes.
and to disagree doesn't necessarily means to hate. and to hate doesn't necessarily means to be an anti. being nice is one thing with regardless. some people might called it fake, but what's the deal? stop being nice? you know that is not even an option. sincerity doesn't made overnight. it's trained.
every generation has their own urge to say "dasar, anak jaman sekarang!"
however, when they did, i couldn't help thinking,
"oh, they never really be that 'anak jaman sekarang' on their ages back then...
...or maybe they did (of course everybody did). they just now choose pretending to forget about that.
since that might be one painful memory they don't want to keep."
well, i used to be that 'anak jaman sekarang' back then,
whether i like it or not, though.
so now whenever possible, i avoid saying such things.
let's just give room to changes,
just like what the universe had always done for us,
whether we noted it, or not.
or, it's just that after one or two generations it got bored saying such : "dasar anak jaman sekarang!"
and thus, accepted the fact that every generations actually speaks different "todays".
i once wrote somewhere on twitter "when bad things happened to you, think. was there any thing bad you might had done to anyone else?" as a self note for myself.
and since sometimes back then, i always try not to post negative emotional lines that's supposed to be expression of my disappointment towards some people. i try to be fair. if i couldn't say it directly to the respective person, then i don't have any right to throw it to just anybody else on my timeline, do i? but i admit, it's one difficult thing. however, that's not enough reason for me to stop trying.
so, whenever bad things happen, i always, and will always try to keep this inside me : "what had i done bad?" not as an excuse to just let bad things happen to me, but rather as tool to help me accept that it happened.
i was born near the heart of 80s, grew up listening to 90s music and watching western television series, later fell in love with 2000s eastern dramas, however read storiette of mid 70s teenage girl's magazines. now i'm enjoying the aftertaste :)
"Girls are taught a lot of stuff growing up. If a guy punches you he likes you. Never try to trim your own bangs and someday you will meet a wonderful guy and get your very own happy ending. Every movie we see, Every story we're told implores us to wait for it, the third act twist, the unexpected declaration of love, the exception to the rule. But sometimes we're so focused on finding our happy ending we don't learn how to read the signs. How to tell from the ones who want us and the ones who don't, the ones who will stay and the ones who will leave. And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe... it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is... just... moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this, knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment you never gave up hope."
