when love is about when.

"When was the last time you fall in love?" A stranger asked me a strange question I had to take a couple seconds to ensure I heard it right. And then I took another couple more to think for the answer.


I always hate getting any questions I could not answer. That means something is out of my hands. That means there are things I am not capable of taking care of. But back to the question, should falling in love be a thing to question?


"I don't remember exactly about the time...maybe it's during my mid-twenties?" I gave him an answer in hesitation, torn between should I give an answer to lead a meaningful conversation, or should I give an answer to stop any talks about this topic. "Well, I don't mean the normal time, I mean the time of your state of emotion, do you remember? Is it when you feel so full, or instead when you feel so dull? Did you fall while being happy, or sad, or excited about life, or lonely?" he elaborated.

"Hmmhh, I remember I was in doubt. I remember I was in fear. But I remember I was so in love."
"Did the love work as you expected?"
"I also remember I wasn't expecting it to actually do something."
"So the love fade?"
"The love was standing there."
"What about the doubt, and the fear?"
"They consumed me."
"So the love didn't save you?"
"I saved myself."

"So you survived. And when do you think you will fall in love again, if it would ever happen though?" he continued. This time I firmly reply, "When the light is not so dimmed that I could clearly spot a just-right love to fall into."


"We can have another cups until the sun rise, then."