[journal] e.

...no matter how much i love being solitaire, just like any normal human being, i wish to have somebody to pat my back at times i was on my weakest. but most of times, whenever i turn my head around, i saw just nobody. and while i tried to tell my unimportant stories, i immediately got an "if it's me..." (or how should i translate this correctly : "kalo aku..." or "saya mah..."?). and  just when i didn't even get a chance to whine, suddenly there's an "oh, c'mon...it's not that big deal!" (again, how should i translate this : "ah, gitu doaaang")...

really, world.

...or maybe it's that i was never too much of patting someone else's back? or maybe it's that i was never a fullhearted listener? or maybe it's that i never see things fairly?...

really, me.

. . . 

heart : "i don't know anymore..."
head : "you dare come to me acting as a victim, i'll sure be a real villain to you"
conscience : "there..there... it's just an up and down. don't be such a crybaby. don't be such a rockhead. emotion's best friend is energy. patting your own back couldn't be that bad, for now, until you're grown up enough to be patted by somebody else. :)"


(this post is coincidentally inspired by Epik High's sixth official album with title [e], of which is both [e]motion and [e]nergy)